“None of us has our stuff together,” says Dr. Kindaichi, “Not completely. Though, we’d like others to believe.”
For those who shudder at the thought of conversing with a stranger, Dr. Kindaichi couldn’t be more right. Each of us goes about our lives harboring baggage that we’d like to think is not so transparent. We’d like to think others can’t see what’s underneath the hood but certainly it’s obvious to us. It seems like talking to people should be instinct—hardly worth a “how to” guide. But for some of us, interacting with others doesn’t come so easily and the areas where we fall short may not be so obvious. Where one person’s nod can lead to an instant conversation on the metro, someone else might be lucky to avoid staring at the floor during a party. And how can you be expected to know just the right thing to say, with the right tone of voice, the right volume, and the right facial expressions when it’s hard enough to keep your palms from sweating at the thought? How can we have confidence that the self we think we show to others is the self that others really see?
Sometimes the problems we face aren’t all that clear and it requires a change of lens to figure out how we can improve our lives. This theory is at the heart of group support and it’s the driving force behind The Psychological Group of Washington’s mission to offer a way out for those of us who may be struggling when it comes to relationships and interpersonal interactions.
Dr. Mai Kindaichi and Dr. Richard Griffith have begun collaboration on what’s called an Interpersonal Process Group (that’s the technical definition). In layman’s terms, PGW wants to bring together a group of 6-8 people who feel they need work on what it takes to relate to others. Meeting either Mondays or Tuesdays, the group offers a chance for each individual to unpack what he or she can do differently to interact with the world in a more holistic and satisfying way. And the group isn’t just for the meek when it comes to the world of conversation. People struggling with teing highly critical and judgemental, others who can’t make relationships work, or even those just looking to learn about who they are interpersonally can benefit from this group’s supportive process. It’s about identifying where communication goes wrong for each individual and how to correct for success.
“We all have work to do,” Dr. Kindaichi explains, “We all have triggers and places in our souls that are wounded which, when tapped, makes us behave badly.”
Sound like anyone you know? The idea for this group’s process stems from the age-old notion that it’s always better to have more than one perspective. That’s why Dr. Kindaichi and Dr. Griffith will facilitate the group together. Dr. Griffith has worked with countless couples with The Psychological Group of Washington and Dr. Kindaichi has facilitated groups from spiritual and existential support for cancer patients to a young men’s Hip Hop group and LGBT support group for teens. If anyone can lead a host of travelers through the journey of self-exploration, it would be them.
In session, each person will get feedback from both doctors and their fellow travelers on how they’re interacting and what can be improved upon while in a safe and wholesome environment surrounded by people with many of the same goals and concerns. Typically, group therapy goes through stages with “Forming” at the start—a period of coming together. This is followed by “Norming” where the group begins to establish a flow and an understanding of what’s permissible between one another. Those limits are eventually tested in the “Storming” stage when conflicts can arise and the goal of the group is to overcome that conflict, working to better understand and relate to one another. When the worst is past, the group enters “Performing” as a period of personal revelation in which new interpersonal habits have begun to form.
“When it works, it’s eye-opening,” Dr. Kindaichi says, referring to how groups weather the storm. Once the team hits “Adjourning,” the final stage, they’ve come to several realizations that can propel themselves closer to the lives they’ve always imagined. And despite age, background, or walk of life, anyone can benefit from the process of seeing him/herself through the eyes of another. By working through what makes you anxious, angry, or annoyed, you can awaken something that wasn’t there before.
Our hope is that many of you out there will get to experience the transformative benefits of group work with us here at The Psychological Group of Washington. To join the journey, please contact Dr. Mai Kindaichi or Dr. Richard Griffith at (202) 223-9844 or visit us online at www.psychgroupdc.com. The first step is always the hardest but we hope it will lead you through our door and toward a renewed experience of life.
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